Madam Svetlana and the Shuckstein Confession

When I saw Bdubs put out the call on X for an antagonist in a Braunstein, I knew I had to get in on the action being the natural Heel that I am. He wanted to do something with the at time of play unreleased Shucked Oyster made by Black Lodge Games. Do show them some love on X and Youtube, and buy their product on Kickstarter so we get an extra dungeon.

Bdubs asked me if I would mind playing the Madam Svetlana of the Shucked Oyster. My first initial reaction was no, but then i remembered I was going to have to be character in the future when I received the Shucked Oyster and began to think about how funny it could be. After mulling it over I decided to go with it and accepted my role for the night.

Now I'm no ACKS man, but you know I play a mean AD&D. I really only had 30 minutes to skim the rules for ACKS II and I mean briefly. I was basically a Night Hag from AD&D but a level 9 Witch in ACKS with some undetectable charm ability and other neat features like seeing invisible things/ people and being able to curse people without using a cast. I was also gifted whore assassins to help me do my bidding.

My win condition was simple, sacrifice enough players to equal or surpass a combined 10 levels of experience on an evil alter in the basement of The Shucked Oyster. If I succeed, the evil menacing blade Storm Bringer would return to Dubzaron. I also had the option to Sacrafice my main squeeze Jalaan, but due to our relationship it was more of an if all else fails plan. This knowledge also let me know that he is powerful in some way and not to reveal my plans to him.

Part 1: The Fire and The Alley Men

The game starts with everyone running outside of the Shucked Oyster. Someone has started a fire and has fled the scene of the crime. Enter the Dubzaron player characters. I know nothing about them except that 1 of them started the fire. Now to be fare everyone was supposed to know this however BDubs forgot to tell everyone but me and Jalaan because we were in separate voice chats. This would actually end up being hilarious as the session progressed.

Guards and their Lieutenant, which I didn't know was under my bewitchment, began arresting the nasty group of arsonists. Guilt by association, you know? Anyway Jalaan and I fled down an alley when we caught someone tailing us. I tell Jalaan to hide and I'm going to act all helpless and lost. He accepts and hides by turning invisible which I'm able to see but I have no reaction to.

A Thief player comes up to me by the name Doc. He wants to assure me that he knows me and frequents the Shucked Oyster. This naturally comes off as some creepy John who might be a suspect. He offers me a sip of booze and I'm getting major Bill Cosby vibes. He drinks it first to show me it isn't poisoned then I take a drink to play along. He starts trying to flirt with me so i cast Bewitch on him which works to put him into total simp mode.

This is when another gentlemen by the name of Tuck walks up. I don't want to cast anymore spells this early in the session so I start complaining about how I just need to go back to my apartment, which the players take as a sexual advance.

The men say they want to talk and know what happened. Now honestly I just meme up what I think happened some story about a pervert named Larry pointing and saying they went that way. This made it sound like I was lying since they didn't yet know one of them was the culprit.

Jalaan comes in clutch here and says he was looking for me. I tell him these creeps keep fallowing me and they are wit the arsonists. Tuck mentions a fat guy with them involved in petty white collar crime or something so we throw that back in their face and plan on reporting them to the guards if they don't leave us alone. We walk off and tell some guards about the men and the white collar criminal with the group of suspects before heading back to a flop house aka the apartment to lay low.

Part 2: A Talk With The Mayor

At this point guards are asking around for me. I decide to get ahead of this fiasco and since I'm innocent nothing should go wrong. I hop in the voice chat and without breaking character talked in my funny female voice for 15 minute straight until I just couldn't keep it up and we both stared cracking up. I basically said I was innocent, told him about the Larry thing and how I'm innocent and about the men tailing me and Jalaan.

The Mayor wants to be repaid for damages to the next store barracks that was burnt down and being a rich I just agree, doesn't really matter to me at all. At this point I'm tempted to bewitch the mayor but I only had about 5 spells total and didn't want to use them yet. (This was taking place at about 2/3s of the games time) I agree to cooperate with the law and even suggest them helping us search future guests for weapons, again it doesn't really matter to me if I make this concession for long term.

Finally I bring up Jalaan. I should of ratted on him but I wanted to sacrifice him now because it was getting late. I told the Mayor to Go easy on Jalaan I know he is a bad man but we just trying to make it as honest brothel owners. Eventually he lets me go and im really upset I havent sacrificed anyone yet, so I head back to the burnt ruins of the Shucked Oyster to set up a trap.

Part 3: The Hooker Ambush!

I get into the Shucked Oyster voice chat and devise a plan for a trap and finally some action. I send some hoe assassins to try to bring Jalaan back to the Shucked Oyster. In the mean time I ask BDubs if I have any poison. I explained how I imagine we have some mickies or paralyze/ sleep poisons to rob guests like Cardi B. He likes this idea and gives we 2 paralyze poisons and a big damage one.

I give my bottom bitch, a level 4 assassin, and a level 3 the paralyze potions and have them hide amongst the rubble to wait for my signal.

Time starts passing and I worry I'm not going to get to do anything cool when 2 PCs show up to confront me, perfect. I spring my ambush but they make the saves vs poison, ugh not good.

My contingency plan is to use curse of swine to pig the players then use dominate animal to get them on the alter for sacrifice. Since their souls would be the same this would work for my sacrifice. This again doesn't go as planned. Again both saves by pcs were made and I could only pig some hirelings, BOOO!!!!

With only 1 spell left, its time to retreat from this failure. I cast invisibility and attempt to flee but the MU casts some glow dust spell that outlines my voluptuous body. I use my Wand of fear and tell get away from me and am able to scare the PC's away. I dart for the back ally since its all I got and even pass a save on a hold person spell the cleric tried to use on me. Maybe I will get out of here just fine, I thought.

Part 4: BUSTted

I'm about to be home free! I look for something to help me wash the dust off so I can slip away but a group of men and that simp from the alley earlier are coming in from the alley. They see me and move to engage. I hear the Mayor screaming at his troops to arrest everybody, but a women such as myself is not going to jail. I try my luck with the wand again and manage to fear the fighter PC off me, I could make it away still. I'm barely standing with 6 hp and their is one more hireling turn before I'm free to escape. He hits me with an arrow dealing the exact 6 needed to K.O. me. The simp has his revenge and says he is going to stabilize me but just kills me for leading him on earlier. RIP Madam Svetlana.

Quick After Thoughts

• First off I want to thank BDubs for running this. It was hands down the best Braunstein I've played. The interactions between Patron esq and regular PCs was fun and engaging and made everything have the living world feel. #ThankYouBDubs

• Playing this type of character would of been much harder if we used AD&D. Why you ask? Because in ACKS you do not have to prep or memorize spells. You just have your slots and pick whatever. It took place over a few hours in game time so you would of been stuck with whatever spells you chose. This could have changed how I would of approached things but thanks to the ACKSII system, I could play fast and loose which helped me out.

• 2 Referees might be ideal for Braunsteins. During the last hour when the ambush was happening BDubs was getting pulled 3 different ways when he just wanted to finish adjudicating the combat. This problem is not something unique to any one Braunstein. It even happened during my 12 hour marathon session. co Refs would help with flow of events but Its hard to make this happen.

• Modules are back on the Table for the BROs because we play them better with incorporation of Braunstein play.

• I want to do a Braunstein like this for my players in the coming months so stay tuned!

• Buy The Shucked Oyster and Support Black Lodge Games here. They have not paid me a dime to shill, but I would take some cash if they change their minds. haha